Forwarded by a mutual friend:
Doctors
(A) The number of physicians in the U.S. is 700,000.
(B) Accidental deaths caused by Physicians per year are 120,000.
(C) Accidental deaths per physician is 0.171.
[Statistics courtesy of U.S. Dept of Health and Human Services.]
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Guns
(A) The number of gun owners in the U.S. is 80,000,000 (Yes, that's 80 million).
(B) The number of accidental gun deaths per year, all age groups, is 1,500.
(C) The number of accidental deaths per gun owner is .000188.
[Statistics courtesy of FBI.]
>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Statistically, doctors are approximately 9,000 times more dangerous than gun owners. Guns don't kill people, doctors do.
Please alert your friends to this alarming threat. We must ban doctors before this gets completely out of hand.
Out of concern for the public at large, statistics on lawyers withheld, for fear the shock would cause people to panic and seek medical attention.
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Grant, there's only ONE possible conclusion. You are dangerous.
Probably only to yourself, but evenso.
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12 comments:
So, what: do we shoot the lawyers, and let the doctors kill 'em?
That sounds lovely.
THERE WERE NO WITNESSES!
I deny everything, she asked me too, and it was in a different part of town entirely!
I have an eelibi!
It wasn't me.
---Grompton Hamster
Grant, we have photos! And tapes!
Ha ha, soon your evil sway will be ended! Our goal is in sight!
What proportion of Patels are complete loonies?
Grant probably accidentally kills people with his panties.
What proportion of Patels are complete loonies?
All?
None. None at all. We are completely and entirely sane. One hundred and thrity percent. Alll of our personalitites. How dare you call us boozoo! Except for the idolatrous ones, that is. Bloory Ahmedabadis!
---Grand Pontoon
In all particulars!
---Groome Pregnant
You ARE a looney!
You ARE a looney!And he's also a 'boozoo'!
In all particulars.
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